How to Lose a Girl in One Ride...

How to Lose a Girl in One Ride

Article March 2016

Single?    Or do you just feel single because your wife or girlfriend doesn’t want to go riding with you?    Or maybe you are missing out on the group rides with friends because he goes out and hangs with the guys for a day of riding?   Or MAYBE you both just stay home because like the old saying “If mama ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy”.

There are many girls out there who love being “in” the wet mud all day, every day. They don’t mind if they are dipped from head to toe and ride like that all day long. For most of us though that type of ride every now and then could be “ok” but if that is what riding side by sides is all about well ~ we probably don’t want much to do with it because it starts to sound...miserable.

Many people envision riding outdoors as roughing it and they can’t quite wrap their imagination around what the experience is actually like.      As a result, they miss out on a lot of fun. There are others who say they tried it and they were so miserable “it’s just not for them”.

Riding with someone recently (who happened to be a single guy) had me thinking by the end of the day that “IF this is what riding was ALWAYS like I would NEVER want to ride again ~ EVER”!

I had on my normal sunglasses and a bandanna which is typically all that is needed but on this ride, I felt like I was in an end of world sand apocalypse.    Never really experienced anything good about the riding that day because I was exhausted just trying to keep the millions of particles of dirt and sand out of my face. Probably didn't help that I wrapped just about anything I could find around my head to the point I thought I would smother. Each time we made a stop my face looked like the bottom of my boots and by the time I picked all of the dirt out of my eyes we were “off” again.

Can you say long day?

You forgot to mention ~ No Amenities. You are in denial if you think it’s not easier for a guy “to go” compared to a girl. A guy simply takes a quick “look” at a tree somewhere discreetly where a girl… well ~ let’s just say it’s much more complicated since the pants must come down. Don’t wait until you are out riding somewhere for her to figure out there may not be a port-o-potty or restroom for miles (and she didn’t know to bring any TP)!

There is a reason that for hundreds of years women over time have carried “purses” and bags. We LIKE to be prepared ….for everything. The great thing about being in a side by side is that there is plenty of room to bring some type of waterproof bag to carry things you may need. Face gets dirty, here is a baby wipe. Dirt in your eye, here is a mirror and some Visine. Splinter, no worries here are some tweezers. Got to go? Well look here …a travel pack of Kleenex. You get the drift!

Hard Core Riding is your thing.     Ride awhile, visit awhile, ride awhile, visit awhile ~ this makes for a much more laid back day.    If you strap her in and just drive like a race car driver for hours on end…you may discover it’s just not her thing.

When she asks “what do I wear” you say well you are not going to a fashion show so just dress for outdoors.    Not having a pair of tall Rain Boots, no bandanna or being too hot or too cold because of how you’re dressed IS a problem so what to wear is VERY important.      We met a couple recently and she was wet within the first 30 minutes of the ride all because she had no idea how to be prepared or what to expect.

You like to be the lone wolf. Just riding with the two of you can be VERY romantic now and then but overall it’s much more fun to ride with a group of friends.     A great part of riding with a group is the comradery of being with people…it becomes a social outing.   Besides, if you get stuck or stranded with no one to help out what happens then! Don’t have anyone to ride with?   No problem ~ look for a group and jump on in because you will find that the large majority of people riding will love having you come along.

You don’t pay attention when she wants to take the wheel. She wants to drive ~ move over you might actually enjoy being the passenger for a change. Or maybe you are the couple that no matter who is behind the wheel the backseat driver in one of you just can’t help but speak up and direct the way. The simple solution is to buy that 2nd Buggy to have a HIS and HERS.

After all, you can’t put a price on love!

We heard someone saying his wife didn’t really like to ride, said she probably wouldn’t like anything near dirt or mud.   Hmmm, think I know why!      So you went out and spent a pretty penny on a new side by side and think there is nothing else that you need “to add”.

SO HOW DO YOU LOSE A GIRL IN ONE RIDE?

You have NO Windshield because you like the wind on your face.         Being one with nature doesn’t mean you have to have nature in all of your parts.    Typically sunglasses and a bandanna are all that is needed to keep away the elements like dirt and sand flying in your face.    If there is no windshield (even partial) for any type of protection then you can start to envision the dirt apocalypse mentioned above that made for a completely miserable day!

You don’t think Mud Flaps are necessary.   You look around and seem to be the muddiest of everyone in the group and wonder how the HxLL everyone is staying so much cleaner.

You say that Doors and Roofs are for houses.
Can you say wind tunnel effect?     Especially with no windshield, door of any sort or roof that is a lot of wind, dirt, sand, mud or water that could be flying in.     If you have ever been slapped in the face by a branch or hit by a flying rock this can also add a nice layer of protection.

No MUSIC because you feel it’s not necessary to go to the trouble of adding a stereo system just to ride around outside.  Really?! Even babies in the womb respond to music.      It creates the right mood whether you are riding in the woods somewhere or riding with a big group of people.